Misc. Musings

"You're the older year old."  -Juliet, today.  In the bathtub.

I just closed my eyes and prayed that I could remember what it was that Juliet said that I didn't want to forget.  My life is filled with things I don't want to forget.  I want to hear things like bathtub conversations and sear them into my brain like a signet seal in wax.

But I'm laundering.  And cooking.  And *cleaning.  And this week is our last week of summer so we are all making sure we have all our books and a plan for school and I can feel my sanity slipping through my fingers.  I feel ashamed to be doing the one thing I beg my children no to do: complain.

If I had encountered a person like myself, six kids, starting her 9th year of home school (10, if you count pre-K) I would look at myself and think "She totally knows what she's doing."  But now, being that person, I can tell you with 100% certainty that I have NO idea what I'm doing and I'm just moving forward and praying that I don't make any huge mistakes and that my children learn enough to stave off the guilty conscience I fight to quiet so I can sleep at night.

You become numb to the pain.  Dealing with the noise, chaos, and mess of being together all day every day is like a prima ballerina on pointe.  Her toes may be bleeding and calloused, but she doesn't even feel it anymore.  In a good way.  The end result is shockingly beautiful.

Lately I've been trying to figure out how I became lazy and messy.  And I realized.  It's because my life is full of things I have to do.  So when I have the chance to let something wait until later, I usually do.  Because trying to stay on top of everything all the time is only possible if I don't sleep, don't eat, and spend 24 hours a day reminding my children to put away what they got out and clean up what they messed up.

And then there's the baby.  Such a wonderful picture of God's graciousness to His children.  Bringing everyone around such JOY.  But growing up and making me realize I'm almost done with babying.  I've been babying for nearly 14 years.  I love babying.  I want to baby forever.  I know life will go on.  But I've had a baby on my hip for a long time.  I love the feeling.  I am thankful for the babying.

I want to write more blogs.  I want to have time to craft a balanced essay of deep thoughts and humor and comedic blurbs about life as a mom of six.  But I feel like what used to be an ability to serve up steak has turned into leftover hamburger helper.  (Which is like fresh hamburger helper only super more gross.) I am afraid my brain has been fried by my iPhone.  That I have become a robot who charges her batteries by watching screens instead of eating good food or digesting God's Word.

And yet deep inside I believe the promise that "He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it."  And somehow this continues to happen, despite myself.  I want to teach my children the truth, the right parts of life.  I know it's going to happen mostly by my example.  By my example in the mundane tasks of laundry and food prep.  I want to be an example of someone who knows I'm just a mist that vanishes.  I am, after all, the older year old around here.  Lord, help us all.

I love my kids so much it hurts inside.  I am truly looking forward to a wonderful home school year and a daily grind that brings us closer to each other and makes us more like Jesus.  Bring on the mess.  And may grace abound.

Bob's River Place

After the Fourth of July weekend we headed (all 20 of us) to Bob's River Place. It's a little over an hour from Waldo, on the Suwannee River. 

Bob is just a retired guy in his eighties who, over the years, has built up decks and wooden platforms on the river bank of his property and hanging rope swings off the huge live oaks from which you swing out into the river and let go. You pay to park and that's it. No lines, just people taking turns. Bob has no insurance (as the signs posted on his property attest) so you just swing at your own risk with no hope of a large settlement of you get hurt. 

It was really fun. Like a red neck water park, complete with karaoke you sing in your bathing suit between death defying rope swings called "the demon" to name one. 

My nephew Adam was in his element, swinging and dropping like crazy, the entire time we were there. 

Bob also had a canal of sorts that he dug out and pumped water through as a swimming hole that was shallow and non-moving like the river. (Log roll right over Violet's head.)

Here is little Penelope on the easiest swing. 

 There was also a high dive (on the left) or, you could climb up into a tree and jump off that. Cash is letting go in this picture. Lincoln and Jackson are climbing up behind him. 

Even though she couldn't swing on the ropes Juliet had a great time playing in the splash zone and floating down the river with me and her aunts. 

And speaking of dreaming... That night after we got home I had weird dreams about college students floating through the air on ropes and landing in the 

water. It was like when you are in a car accident and you keep living it over and over in your sleep. Weird. It didn't really hit me how dangerous it was until after we got home and my head hit the pillow. But a little risk was a great reward. We had an awesome fun day as a family. Thanks, Bob!

The Fourth of July

We headed down to Waldo for our annual big family get together the week of July 4th. So thankful for my sisters and their families and of course my parents for loving my six kids and embracing the chaos. 

Penelope was excited to see Pop Pop's chicks, which aren't so little anymore. But she still managed to hold one. 

Dad has built an amazing chicken coop complete with an automatic refilling water dispenser made out of a five gallon bucket and a toilet valve. Chickens have never had it so good. 

After asking on many previous visits, Juliet was allowed to make her mark on the upstairs bathroom shower curtain. 

This year was the first annual photo scavenger hunt at the Waldo flea market. One of the things on our extensive 65 item list (find as many things as you can in one hour) was incorrect grammar. I of course was delighted to find a use of unnecessary quotation marks. 

Of course when you're living the lake life there's lots of skiing. Sometimes it becomes so commonplace you suck your thumb. 

Here's me and Slim. Why must I always grimace like this instead of smiling? It's ridiculous. Stay behind the camera Julie Alley. 

Sunday we all filed in to church together and happily listened to Pop Pop give the children's sermon. It was about chicks and coveting. Not coveting rather. 

Juliet perfected the disc swing!

Aunt Susan and the girls watching one of the many ultimate frisbee games in the backyard. Ultimate!!

And someone enjoyed crawling all over the upstairs loft. 

Happy Fourth of July!!

Summer 2015 - June

The much anticipated visit from the Texas cousins finally came. My sister and her two boys Adam and Lincoln came to Florida and cousin fun began.

We headed next door to swim quite a bit. 

Smile!!

We made our annual trip to Wakulla Springs. 

Adam and Lincoln love the springs! And Juliet!

I bought these two matching suits this year. Which I have to tell you, makes me smile inside and out. 

We went to Tropical Smoothie for FIp Flop Day and got free smoothies for all. 

Yummy!!

We had a fun (tiring and hot) trip to the beach with the Mitchells and Altrogges. The Alleys did it! We had a successful beach day! With a baby!

 Chillin' in the wagon. 

Digging and building. 

Too big to dig and build- now they read books. (And eat.)

The next week it was VBS for Cash and Pip. Then Juliet had a special un-birthday party to celebrate  how wonderful she is, and to make up for the fact that she doesn't really have a chance to have parties since her birthday is on New Years Eve.

Penelope had to say goodbye to her best friend Ellie, who moved to Texas. Such a hard thing for her to do! And hard as a mommy to have to walk her through it. 

 And to end the month we had a huge storm blast down our street, leaving trees down and according to the paper, making Killarney Way look like a "war zone." This is our neighbors roof, which was damaged by a huge pine tree. 

Happy Summer!

My Roots are Salty

Earlier this month we traveled to Satellite Beach for my 20 year high school reunion.  That's right, Class of 1995.  Graduated before everyone had e mail.  And proud.

I had not been to my home town in a little over 3 years.  Since my parents moved I don't get down there very often.  It was cathartic to go home.  Just driving the roads you remember driving on as a child/teen is comforting.  The landscape makes you feel a peace.  No matter what has changed in my world since childhood, I can still go stand on the shore of the Atlantic, step over the same rocks I avoided on my boogie board with Dad.  It's like taking a really deep breath.

I have not kept in touch with many from high school.  But it didn't really matter.  We have a common ground.  We went to high school in such a unique place, many of my classmates checking out the surf from the second floor on the southeast side of the building.  It was fun recognizing faces and exchanging memories.  It was a good lesson in perspective...while I'm sure who I did or didn't sit next to in 2nd period was of utmost importance to me at the time, now I have no idea what class I even had 2nd period and who was in it.

I hope I can apply that to life today.  I'm still trying to figure out how.  To somehow decipher the important things and let the rest play out.  Memories are tricky and the human brain is mysterious.  But I made it through high school with an overall positive experience and I'm glad to celebrate that.

I also got a chance to hang out with my best friend growing up.  We lived next door to each other for 17 years.  I have countless childhood memories with her and I have told my own children tall tales from our adventures in the neighborhood.  It was wonderful to see her and for my kids to get to meet her.

I got to take my precious Violet to the beach for the first time.  I enjoyed watching my kids enjoy the ocean (missing Jackson, who was away at youth camp) and even getting to see some dolphins swimming in the Indian River as we went over the bridge. 

I stopped one last time at the beach closest to my house to take some photos before we drove home.  Just to soak it in, to hear the waves that are the background noise of my memories.  I took a pano of the familiar landscape.  As we were on our way out of town Jimmy said, "Your roots are salty."  And that sums it up perfectly.  I praise God for my salty roots.  And I pray that every day I am making roots for my kids that are strong and deep.  And hopefully a little salty.

The hardest thing is the best

I'd like to tell you about one of the hardest things I have ever done.

It is watching my children grow up.

Every single day they get bigger, and every single day the very thing I wanted to grow up and do is one day closer to being over.  Now I know you're always a mother.  I know my children will probably never leave me alone.  But I just wish it would all slow down or that I could stop time every now and again.
My sweet precious flower Violet has begun to babble "Mah mah mah."  Why does this make me ache inside?  Because my infant is talking to me, that's why.  She's growing too fast.  It goes too fast.

Yet I trust the Lord.  He has designed us humans to grow at just the right rate.  And while it is bittersweet that my baby is babbling and on the verge of crawling all over, I am so thankful that she is healthy and growing.

But there is a "but" here...It may be hard that they change fast and grow up without my consent, but it is the absolute best thing at the same time.  It is fun, it is exciting, it makes my heart overflow.  The hardest thing is the best. 

This is true in much of life.  Trials, difficulties, suffering...how many times have these been the very thing that sprout within you good?  Parenting is hard in many ways, not just the "it's hard to watch them grow up" way.  It is war at times.  But it's still the best thing I've ever done.

The hardest thing is the best.

A Normal Wednesday

This is what I am thinking today as I finally sit down to rest. This is my debriefing. 

Sometimes my kids play so hard I am amazed. Their imagination is going so nonstop I think that soon smoke will be coming out their ears. I have now gotten to the ripe old age in which I say things like, "I don't know where they get all that energy!" It's exhausting to be old with munchkins running around. This is how I feel today. Tired, but happy to have munchkins. 

Tonight as Jimmy was serving everyone their food, he warned everyone that they were driving him crazy and that if they weren't careful he would drop them all off at the bus station. I hadn't heard that one but I totally appreciated the sentiment. Libby proceded to pray for our meal and added "please help dad to feel less like dropping us off at the bus station." 

Things didn't really get much better and at the end of this chaotic dinner during which multiple people were talking simultaneously and the baby was cranky and rubbing carrots and applesauce all over herself, I pleaded with everyone to please, for me, try and be quiet for 60 seconds. I told them I needed to know they were capable of it. Well, it took restarting about 3 times, but they were quiet. And I thought they would say, after doing it, "Wow, Mom! That was so great! We like the peacefulness of quiet!"  But instead I got "so-and-so was reading" and "she was eating so it doesn't count" and such. Oh well. One day maybe they will appreciate quiet. 

And paper. Today I realized we're are nearing the end of a huge box of paper we bought at Sams. We go through so much paper, home schooling 5 kids...with one of them being quite the artist and pulling everyone else along with her. I'm making copies of math drills, coloring pages, Jimmys printing out leases or property information sheets...the amount of paper we go through is staggering. The Alleys do NOT live in a paperless world. 

Jimmy got home from running Jackson to youth group tonight to find all the rest in the driveway. He started playing basketball and they sat and watched him. We have a crowd of kids. A big enough crowd to cheer on a basketball game. This is how Jimmy related it to me later. That he was proud to have a crowd. It is very humbling and fulfilling. 

Then we played "airplane" and Libby was the stewardess. I asked Penelope where she was going ("California") and if she had business there?  ("Yes, and also in Alaska") Then I turned to Juliet. I asked her where she was going ("Florida!") and then I said, "Are you going to make some money there?" And she said, "I am going to make quarters!" 

And now that I've read my bible, written a blog, and told the kids to brush their teeth and get ready for bed (I let them play so I could steal quiet minutes), I'm going to try and make a dent in the mounds of laundry that could, if need be, be fashioned into enough cloth to cover the Great Wall of China.

How we got to six...and quit

When Jimmy and I were hanging, "just friends,"

We were in his truck headed to Walmart (again!)

While talking he accidentally implied 

That one day we'd have kids when we go for a drive

I acted like I didn't get what he said

But of course I filed it away in my head

This guy wanted kids, and quite a few

Which for me, was something I already knew

A wedding was planned, and we tied the knot

We talked about starting a family a lot

And before very long I was reading the books

Jackson was born and we were hooked. 

For over two years it was just us and Jax

We still gave our concerts and played on our Macs. 

Then a sweet girl, though quite overdue

I thought we'd take a break (I didn't have a clue)

That in less than two years I'd do it again

A boy! A new brother, let's call it a win. 

After his labor I said, not lying,

"I don't wanna do that again for a really long time!"

Yet a little bit more than 18 months later,

Julie's at it again, contractions and labor. 

My baby girl came, a small one, petite. 

But having them close I would not repeat. 

You see two in diapers and one barely trained

Made this mother feel like a poop gravy train. 

I had two of each, my mind wanted to quit

But my heart wouldn't have it. That wasn't it. 

So a couple years later I had news to dump. 

I called mom and told her, then promptly hung up. 

Let her chew on that for a while-

We would become a family with five. 

New Years Eve brought us girl number three. 

She was beautiful, quiet, our angel baby. 

Three years later, our kids growing up,

We felt full and finished. We'd had enough. 

Well just about the time we considered "getting fixed"

Surprise! I am pregnant with babe number six. 

I hoped for a girl, it just seemed the best

The boys being a little older than the rest. 

And after nine months of discomfort and pain,

Violet Joy was born, the caboose of our train.

And while I always said I wanted seven kids,

My new dream was to never be pregnant again. 

Even though for a time I thought we'd never stop,

Jimmy's decided to close up shop. 

In fact he's more than decided, the deed has been done.

A new stage of our family has now begun. 

No longer building, we now will maintain

The chaos, education, and hearts of our train. 

God has blessed us with more than I ever could think.

(Though at times total insanity is on the brink!)

So that's how we went from zero to six

Two boys and four girls and a dog in the mix.

I'm thankful and proud, feeling joyful no less,

I'm content and at home in this beautiful mess. 

A Mixed Tape

In spring cleaning we found a tape from 7-eleven.  Lifetime guarantee!

I hope this blog is kind of like a mixed tape of my life.  I take the moments that make me feel...joyous, funny, happy, sad, nostalgic, proud...and smoosh them all together.  And in the end I give it to my kids.  A collection of the music of our life that I hope brings them nothing but a feeling of love, grace, and peace.  They are safe here in our family.

We took a family selfie in the mirrored ceiling of the dollar store.

I hate that I have neglected the blog this month.  A lot has been going on.  A lot of the mundane, as always, but there have been wonderful moments within it.  Spring is here and full of color and perfect "go play outside" weather.

Here are a few photos of our life from about the last three weeks. 


The kids put on a show in the garage for our amazing and super fun neighbors. 

The middles enjoyed climbing a big tree down the street from our house. 

Everyone everywhere enjoys Violet's cuteness every minute of every day. 

 

 Juliet likes taking self portraits.  And she's really excited about reading!

Violet continues to grow despite my pleas to not get one day older.  She is her name.  A joy.


"set their hopes...on God, who richly provides us with everything to enjoy." 1 Timothy 6:17