The Fantastic Four

The kids got a 30 second timer from a kids meal at Chick-Fil-A. So at dinner last night Jimmy challenged us all to be completely quiet for 30 seconds. We failed. Multiple times. It wasn't the same person every time, but we just couldn't make it. I am convinced that the only time we could be quiet for 30 seconds in a row is when we're all sleeping.

I have also been thinking about the Boxcar children. There were four of them, two boys and two girls, just like my kids. Jimmy, being a realtor, has access to many vacant homes. I was thinking that we could just leave the kids here, in my rectangular "boxcar" home, if you will, and Jimmy and I could become squatters at various nice homes in Tallahassee. I really think the kids could make it now. We could drop off some groceries every now and then. Maybe some new underwear. And they could last for a while. The boxcar children even moved past mere survival on to solving local mysteries.

I am only joking of course, but one sometimes considers it when you enter the kitchen and your children are "making grape juice" by crushing sticky grapes all over the place. But "don't worry mom, we're eating the skin too, we're not wasting it." I'm glad you're so resourceful, kids.

I have also been thinking about the baby and kid items that every parent wishes they sold in stores but would never be patented because they're potentially dangerous. Like, the elastic band that goes around your baby's face to keep the pacifier in. Or, which I've been in need of lately, the fence you can attach to your bunk beds to make them into huge cages so your kids are completely contained at night. Or a shock collar for screaming. If I could find a way to get some of these on the black market, I could make millions.

Anyway, here are my fantastic four. Capable of all kinds of feats of strength, yelling, mischief, happiness, and love. They are the best.