A lapse in blog does not mean a lapse in blog worthy happenings. It means there's no time to process life, you just ride it until it slows down a little.
So here's what's going on.
Only one a month through the end of this calendar year, but lots of head space is devoted to this. And new blog space, actually.
Trying to find my way through the day and keep the academic agendas at the forefront of my mind for a K, 2nd, 4th, and 6th grader leaves me feeling a little drained at the end of the day. I spend much of my time redirecting and honing people in to stay on task and finish. And then as I lie down my head I begin to strategize new behavioral methods and reward systems to keep said children on task. They want to build forts and play with toys and I want to do it with them. But there is some sort of squawking parrot of sorts who sits on my shoulder and tweets "Math!" "Language!" "Reading!" "Science!" "You don't want your children to grow up ignorant!" and other such blips.
I have begun to schedule photography appointments for the next two months. I have begun to be one of those people who doesn't remember life without a calendar. I actually used to remember everything. Now I'm sure there will be someone I forget even with a meticulous calendar. I have filled all my slots and then some and I feel many different things. Excitement. Anxiety. Humility. Stress. Determination. Joy. I sleep a little between all this.
Our first of the season this past weekend. I stayed in town and worked a wedding and Jimmy took the children to Brandon. I hate being away from my family but did actually enjoy the space a little and it went fast. We are now living in the "let's keep everything clean" first few days but we know we will fail and we must return to our life as rock stars in a hotel room eventually. Penelope knocked our her other front tooth Saturday. Her mouth/chin has nine lives. But less teeth!
What a nice word. Epiphanies. Epiphanies. Epiphanies. Watching my Ju Ju and Pip play last week I felt sad. They were running around the FSU school of music courtyard (Capital City Children's Choir is also going on...) and deep down I saw the joy and wonder of my precious children. But mostly I felt sad. I wanted to be in the moment and laugh--or at least smile uncontrollably. Instead I felt deflated. Why? Because they are growing up too fast. They are so big. There is so much behind us. So many good times and pieces of life I can't get back. But this epiphany was good. I'm aware. I'm going to try and love the present. Run around with them and not be sad about the past that is gone. It has brought us to this. Joyful moments with nothing to play with but reeds of grass.