4/22/2011

The Bathroom Gecko

We have had a gecko living in our bathroom for over a year. I see him every once in a while, scurrying away as I move the stool or get a towel from the closet. He is like our family mascot or something. Why? He must be a fan of ours. Who else would stick around? And even more, who would want to live in a bathroom shared by 7 people, about half of which cannot bathe themselves?

And another thing I think about our gecko friend. What must he eat to survive? I keep thinking he'll starve but still he appears now and again. There is a lot of stuff in the bathroom. A lot happens in there. But there is absolutely nothing edible in there. Does he drink drops of water from the floor? Eat flecks of poop? Strawberry toothpaste for dessert maybe? One has to wonder.

After I saw him tonight I began compiling a list in my head of things he overhears in the bathroom.

"I went poo-poo!"
"Mom!............Mom!...........Can somebody wipe me?"
"I need privacy!"
"I told you not to follow me in here!"
"I'm taking a shower, I'll be out in a minute."
"I need toilet paper!"
"It says to wait three to five minutes." (that's a joke)
"Middles in the tub!"
"I get the front!"
"Okay, stand up, it's time to wash your bodies."
"You're getting me wet!"
"Do washing machine!" (a washing game we play)
"Do you're my baby boy (or girl)!" (a post bathtime song we sing)
"Wash your hands!"
"Wash your face!"
"Brush your teeth!"
"Hurry up!"
"What are you doing in here?"
"Mom, don't put that wipe in the toilet or you'll have to call the plumber again."

4/21/2011

Nakey Baby

It is hard for me to capture my babies smiling and be behind the camera at the same time. I figured I could get a bunch of Juliet if I tried when she was naked because she loves being naked. She flaps her arms and does her legs like she's on a bicycle. So here she is in all her glory, cuteness, and squishy baby-ness. What am I going to do when I don't have a cute little baby to put on my blog? It's going to be sad! But I am enjoying the now if it all. Here's to precious baby smiles!





4/19/2011

Monsterisms

A couple of things...

Today I realized there is a monster living in my house. It has three heads, seven arms, and poopy drawers. It's name is Laundry. This monster is never defeated. I try to slay him with my determination, organization, and soap. But still I am overtaken by his sheer force. He is darks, lights, whites, towels, sheets...socks that hide under the couch. He fills up my baskets and overflows onto the floor. He is a growing mound of dirty underwear, sweaty t-shirts, poopy baby sleepers. No matter what I do, he is winning all the time. And just when I think I've got him by the throat, I head to bed to find a mound to be folded that I forgot I put back there earlier in the day. Even clean the monster rears it's ugly head.

Time is passing and my children are growing up. I try to make it go just a bit slower but a day is a day and a minute is a minute and time is passing at the same rate it's always been. This is an "ism" I've been telling myself when I think things are going by too fast. I tell myself that time has always gone at the exact same pace. There's nothing I can do to slow it down. It just seems like it's speeding by. It's not.

My mom also gave me a good "ism" a few days ago. She said, "It's not so much what you've got as what you do with what you've got." This has encouraged me in quite a few ways.

And I'll end with this quote I came across...it speaks of the wonderful mess that raising a family is. I'm so glad we're together.

"The web of our life is of a mingled yarn; good and ill together." -William Shakespeare

4/08/2011

Now Hiring

Personal Assistant

Seeking intelligent, effective, and agreeable individual to help with personal needs, household needs, and business needs. Hard working individuals not afraid to get dirty or raise their voice need only apply. Not looking for people who are above performing any simple task such as bottom wiping, nose blowing, or toilet scouring.

Other skills, duties, and traits I am seeking in applicants:

-able to do laundry
-in shape, able to lift 40+ pounds
-washing dishes
-grading papers
-singing songs, knows at least 50 children's tunes
-library skills/book reading
-excellent communication skills
-chauffeur
-data entry/sorter
-organized
-tickle monster
-standard phone etiquette
-extremely patient
-personal chef
-tech support
-photography assistant
-changing diapers
-party planner
-good listener
-able to tune out crying
-occasional wet nurse
-100% available all hours, all days, with ability to travel on short notice

This is an excellent full time, long term position and a great opportunity for someone who thinks they want to have a bunch of children.

Salary: you can keep whatever you sweep up in the dust pan or find in the washing machine.